Dan Bull – Dear Mandy [an open letter to Lord Mandelson]
Dear Peter Mandelson,
I’ve been following your recent policy proposals, so now they’ve gone through, I thought I’d contribute some vocals. The focal point of my criticism’s the ridiculous decision to bring in a system where you flick a switch and disconnect the internet when it’s suspected that intellectual infringement has been detected, even if the relatives they live with definitely didn’t. I think it’s in your best interest to bin this, yes? ‘Cause isn’t it a respected institution that we’re considered innocent unless different is proven? Er, excuse me – how can you excuse exclusion when you’ve not pursued a definite conclusion?
You’re picking on the little man, the Lilliputian; now there’s a pain in my gulliver and it’s confusing. You’re swift to treat your citizens with such little human humour it’s no wonder that we’re disilliusioned. This resolution’s gonna end in revolution just like any other governance that doesn’t accept evolution. To be perfectly honest, m’lord, there’d be less intrusion if you curtly abolished the law and left us to it.
And why do games require safety ratings, but any age can see adult-aimed plays and paintings? It’s state censorship, the same as Beijing; but even China thinks a pirate isn’t worth the time of day for chasing. I think Chairman Mao would say the same thing – since you became secretary, it’s like the state’s your plaything. You made a massive sacrifice, invaded loads of privacy, but if I wanted to download, there’d be no hope of finding me. I could take my mobile phone to the local library, and utilise the free wireless to find the file I need. Then what are you going to try – to disconnect their ISP? You might as well just burn the books on rights to speech.
Dear Mandy, stay away from my family. Yours considerably angrily, Dan Bull. Dear Mandy, stay away from my family. Yours considerably angrily, Dan Bull.
Who’ll profit from the Digital Economy Bill? Not the public, but the profiteers probably will. Who’ll profit from the Digital Economy Bill? Not the public, but the puppeteers probably will. I’ve talked about how intellectual property kills and you’re still just concerned with who’s copping the bill. It’s quite obvious you’ve been lobbied until the copy holders got control, and you’re probably their shill. It’s not your problem when you’re positioned on top of the hill, in your property that probably cost a couple of mil. But wake up and smell the coffee, the milk is going off and you’re not bothered ’cause your coffers are filled.
Lord, it’s time you took an honesty pill, and acknowledged the majority aren’t horribly thrilled. So what if I watched a torrented comedy film? I don’t need to now my country’s just become a Brazil. You know the truth, Orwell spoke his views, your House broke the news and all Hell’s broken loose. The utopia we hoped for is overdue, so could you help out a little bit and don’t be stupid?
The onus is on you to show us you aren’t using your throne in a way the voters don’t approve. I know you’re very close to David Geffen, so maybe his interests have given you a hazed perception. Hey, do you reckon you’d win today’s election, considering you’re chasing this amidst a great recession? Deception’s the politician’s favourite weapon but we’re already jaded from one too many painful lessons.
Dear Mandy, stay away from my family. Yours considerably angrily, Dan Bull. Dear Mandy, stay away from my family.
Yours considerably angrily,
P.S. I love you, Mandy x